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20 Questions To Ask a Girl

By on May 19, 2015

Asking a girl questions is one of the nicest ways to show interest in her. Not only that, it allows you to get to know her better so you can decide if you’re compatible. If you’re on a first date with a girl that makes you nervous, these lists of  20 questions to ask a girl will help you get over those first date jitters.

 20 Questions To Ask a Girl

1. Who do you consider a mentor?

This is a good question to see if they have done some self reflection in their lives to make themselves a better person. If they can’t think of one, chances are they aren’t very mature yet.



2. What do you do for fun?

Here’s a great question that can help you get to know if you’re remotely compatible. If you’re constantly outdoors and she hates to get dirty, let’s face it, this might not be a match made in heaven. But if you find out she loves perusing vinyl record stores and you love analog music, you’ll like her even more!


3. What were you really into in high school?

This can open up a conversation about how she has changed or show you more of what type of person she is. Maybe she was really into sports or volunteering, chances are she hasn’t changed that much.


4. Have you kept in touch with your high school friends?

This is a great follow-up question which can help you know if she relates to the people she went to school with or if they have grown apart. Maybe she’s closer to her college friends or her family members but notice how she speaks of others. A nice woman will always speak kindly of others.


5. What cities have you lived in?

Here is a great question to understand what she has been through, the types of people and cultures she’s interacted with and what lifestyle she likes. If she’s been in one town her whole life, her perspective might be drastically different than someone who moved around all the time.


6. What are your closest friends like?

They say you know a person by the friends they keep. Notice if her eyes light up when she talks about her friends and if she speaks highly of them. If a girl can keep strong and positive friendships, she’s probably girlfriend material.


7. Have you had any long-term relationships?

This can kind of steer the conversation positive or negative but you don’t want to avoid it. Notice if she’s still angry at someone or if she speaks about what she learned about herself in a relationship. A mature woman won’t pull the victim card.


8. What dream are you working towards?

If you’re going to try to fit your lives together, it’s important to know which direction you’re steering yourselves. If she just lives for the moment, well that might mean she’s not looking for anything serious. Don’t be too hard on her if she’s still trying to figure things out.


9. Are you similar to your parents?

Undoubtedly, parents have a major impact on a girl’s personality. Maybe her parents are nothing like her and that is what inspired her to be who she is. You’ll learn a lot about her when she reveals her parents qualities. Remember not to say anything judgmental about her parents because she loves them.


10. What makes you the most happy in life?

Here is an open ended question that will show you something very deep about her. If she is a deep person, it might be something abstract like books or volunteering but if she is a shallow person, it might be shopping or watching desperate housewives.


11. What’s something you’re not good at?

If she can’t think of anything, run, don’t walk, in the other direction. If she thinks she’s too cool for school, this girl needs a wake up call. It’s really valuable to know your weaknesses and you want to see that she is actively working on becoming a better person.


12. How do you think other people see you?

We all know that a lot of girls have a low self esteem so you want to gauge their level of self confidence. Pay close attention to this question and you’ll get an inside peek at how they think.


13. What moment stands out in your mind that changed your life?

Another great question to see into what has shaped their life and how they deal with adversity is this one. You will see if they like to look at things positively or if they hold onto negative feelings for a long time.


14. Are you religious?

Well it’s a sticky subject but life views and ethics are important to discuss in any relationship. You should have some common ground on your belief systems when you discuss the meaning of life or you may find yourselves growing in opposite directions.


15. Do you like mornings?

Don’t over analyze this one. If she’s not a morning person and you are, you can find a happy medium. If you get along, this isn’t a deal breaker, it’s just an important part of knowing someone.


16. Do you have any special dietary needs?

This is important so you know where to go for dates and if you’re going to cook for her, you want to be sensitive to what she wants to or needs to avoid.


17. Do you prefer big concerts or small?

This can help you understand if she likes mainstream music or indie music and get a feel for the vibe that she is attracted to.


18. Are you more introverted or extroverted?

This can help you understand if she is independent or needy. If a girl isn’t comfortable being by herself sometimes, chances are she is codependent. If she is confident and has a select group of high quality friends, she’s probably a catch. If she has no friends, she might not be ready to be giving in a relationship capiche?


19. Do you consider yourself hardworking or lazy?

This is a great question to see how well she follows through with tasks and how much she relies on other people. Maybe she supports other people in her family or maybe she is constantly doing things for others. This can start a very valuable conversation.


20. What do you look for in a guy?

This will help you know if you are a good match for her. If she says a nice car and a graduate degree, maybe you’re barking up the wrong tree. If she focuses on character and non-materialistic things, you might have a keeper.


These questions will help you look past the surface and get to know who they are. As they show you their personality, you will intuitively either like them more or start to shy away. Being a good listener will give you lots of brownie points just as talking about yourself too much will not. Remember to be a gentleman at all times and not just comment on her looks because a solid woman will expect you to communicate with her about more than just physical attraction.

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